It’s January.  Like every new year, most of America will be in high gear with diet and exercise.  This is the exact same cycle I’ve been on since adulthood, but where does one start?  How do I get motivated when I’m feeling overwhelmed and not very good about myself?   Most importantly, how do I maintain the momentum?  The control center of the brain is the mind, so starting from within is essential to staying healthy both physically and emotionally.  I’ve listed some of my favorite tips and tricks that have helped me stay on track in my journey of poor body image issues which have plagued me throughout my lifetime.

Don’t set unrealistic goals. I find that when I think too much about what I have to do to stay motivated and all the work that I have to put in to get to my goal, I feel overwhelmed and I put off starting my healthy journey.  For instance, instead of saying “I need to lose twenty pounds, tone up, drink eight glasses of water and exercise everyday” say “This week I’m going to drink eight glasses of water a day and then the next week I’ll start exercising every other day” and so forth.  We all know crash dieting is unhealthy and doesn’t work, so let things come off the way they should in a healthy time frame.   It truly doesn’t have to be a race, be gentle with yourself and take things day by day.

Break down the numbers.  When I had my son, I had a lot of weight to lose, but I felt like it was never going to come off because of the big number, which in turn left me feeling overwhelmed and discouraged.  I decided to change my thinking and told myself, “I’m going to lose 10 pounds” which sounded way better than 50 pounds.  That small change in my mind was enough to keep me motivated and when I lost 10 pounds, it felt great! Then I did it again with another 10 pounds, and another 10 pounds, and so forth until the weight came off.

Don’t become obsessed with the scale once you hit your final goal.  Fine, the scale is good for when you’re losing weight, but after you’ve hit your goal set it aside.  The reason I don’t fool with a scale is pretty simple: It’s a mind f*ck that could turn into an obsession.  Two pounds of water weight made me depressed even when I knew it was from the crunchwrap supreme I ate the night before.  I was hard on myself and started to feel like I was heading into a downward spiral.  I haven’t weighed myself in years and even when I’m at the doctor’s office, I step backwards on the scale because I just don’t want to know.  I always 100% gauge myself with how my clothes fit.  When my jeans get snug, that’s when I know I need to start paying attention to what I eat because I refuse to torture myself on a daily with insignificant numbers.

Listen to your body with exercise.  So, I live off a quiet dirt road and see incredibly fit women jogging back and forth all day.  I tried it.  I was winded and looked like I ran a 25K after less than a 1/4 mile.  I was sweating profusely as I hobbled back home all crooked with my knee not wanting to participate in life after that stunt (thank God no one saw)!  Many moons ago, I was working with a trainer and I looked the best I had ever looked, but the thought of pulling tires from a chain makes me want to throw tires at people now.  I had also joined a gym because “everyone else did” but that was a waste of money because I’m not someone who naturally likes to exercise.  I had to take a step back and evaluate what worked best for me, not what society said was the best for me.  My answer was yoga and pilates.  I’m a lazy exerciser, people!  My ass doesn’t want to be jumping around like a lunatic.  I need a mat, a floor, and some good music to keep me in my zone.  I really love and enjoy those two things, and along with my evening walks, that’s my fitness happy place.  It feels like way less of a chore when you like something so if joining a softball team or going roller skating a few times a week is your thing, do that.  Do what makes you happy and what keeps you motivated because it’s your personal fitness journey.  There are no rules with exercise, you make your own rules and it’s okay to skip a day here or there if you’re not feeling it.

Eliminate the word diet from your vocabulary.  This small change makes such a big impact.  I literally got sick of hearing myself say  “I can’t eat this, I’m on a diet” or “I’m on a diet, we can’t go to that restaurant” on a daily basis.  It was over the top!  Also, to be frank, I wasn’t on any diet whatsoever, I just felt terrible about myself and I felt like I had to continually announce that I was on a diet to make myself feel better.  The day I finally got sick of myself for saying diet on repeat is when I decided to never say that word again.  I changed my mindset to focus on what I could eat rather than what I shouldn’t eat.  Let me say, the options are way better when you pay attention to what you can eat!  For example, instead of saying “I’m not eating carbs because I’m on a diet” I said to myself that I would eat anything I wanted with the exception of gluten, sugar and dairy.  This is a lifestyle change not a diet, those are two totally different things so put yourself into that mindset, it’s more sustainable.  I’ve gotten off track a little, hence this post to motivate myself as well as you all, but I found this tactic to be much easier for me to stay on track knowing that I had a lot more options than one piece of lettuce and a peanut.

Purge your closet.   The best advice I’ve ever received was to give away the clothing that are too big once you hit your goal.  I went from a double digit to a single digit size so I donated all of the clothes that no longer fit me and I only kept a few things that were one size bigger in case I ate too much at during the holidays.  I knew that was a huge commitment because I had already spent my hard earned money on my entire wardrobe but that kept me motivated because I wasn’t about to rebuy a whole new again.  When I wear something, I want to feel my best and the only way that happens is when I look my best.  This rule is no brainer for me because when my clothes get snug, it’s do or die.

Be kind to yourself.  We’re all a work in progress and it’s ok to go south when the destination is north, but how you talk to yourself is key.  It took me a long time to realize that I was much nicer to everyone else than I was to myself.  I focused on the negative whenever I looked in the mirror and would call myself fat or tell myself that I needed to “diet” and get my act together.  The truth is, being confident and happy with yourself has to come from within.  You spend the most time with yourself more than anyone else, so why not make it a positive and happy environment to live in?  I know this is difficult because sometimes you’re just not having a good day, but acknowledge it and tell yourself that you’re doing the best you can and know that tomorrow is a new day.  If you’re saying mean things to yourself, ask yourself if this is the way that you would talk to your daughter, mother, sister, or friend.  If the answer is no then it’s time to stop beating yourself up. 

Remember it’s your journey and no one else’s:  Comments from other people should be completely off limits!  Don’t let anyone tell you how you’re supposed to look, it’s not their business.  Social media is not always a positive place either.  I tend to stay away from social media when I’m not feeling my best because I’m not interested in seeing some fitness model half nude with no stomach rolls when I’m in the middle of a crisis holding a bag of Doritos; that just makes things worse.  If you’re going through your instagram/facebook feed and you’re not feeling good about what you’re seeing, it’s time to shut it down.  Try to be aware of your triggers and honor your feelings, it’s okay to not talk to someone if they say something negative or hurtful or if you’re feeling overwhelmed with social media.  Lastly, when it comes to self care and inner peace, put yourself first and don’t listen to outside noise, you deserve it!

♥